Jan. 4th, 2009

lectrix_lecti: (Tea)
I don't cook. No, really.

I was a semi-competent cook back in the day, but some years ago I went on cooking strike. I had completely lost confidence in my own cooking skills, and hardly dared to heat readymade food because I'd do even that wrong. My husband has never complained about having to make dinner every day, by the way. He seems fully aware of his significant contribution to my refusing to do any cooking.

Not cooking ever means I've basically lost every bit of skill I had around kitchens, baking not included. I can make pancakes and omelettes and fry various meat thingies, that's about it, although I have cooked proper food for myself from time to time when the husband's been away. However, I don't even dare thinking about trying to make stuff like the ultra tasty creamy onion soup I used to make when I was 20-ish. I'd fuck it up from sheer nervousness.

Behold my immense pride when today I made absolutely delicious cauliflower soup. Shit, I haven't made anything from scratch in about eight years. Nine, maybe? And now I have, again. And nothing was fucked up. And the husband who used to complain like seven hells about my rice helped himself to more than was good for him.

I have to pull myself together and cook if I want to eat more vegetarian, and I do want that. A lot of meat makes me slightly queasy and I'd prefer to replace it with vegetables. I'll never go full out vegetarian, though, unless lacto-ovo-bacono-vegetarian becomes an accepted subgroup.

It took quite a bit of time to decide that I need to become able to cook again to actually taking the plunge and daring to serve another person something I made from scratch. Now I feel ridiculously accomplished for something that's such a small thing to everybody else.

Another step in a right, veg-y direction is that we've ordered a bi-weekly crate of organic fruit, veg and eggs. The quality of the fruit and vegetables in our local grocery store is so-so at best, unfortunately. I'm looking forward to getting a surprise crate delivered, and unbelievably, I'm looking forward to digging up recipes for whatever vegetables we get when they've arrived.

July 2009

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